When a family member commits suicide, the entire family is plunged into confusion and grief. Life is instinctually valued by all of life’s creatures.
Even a blade of grass or flower fights for the privilege of life.
When someone close to you voluntarily ends their lives, your entire value system is thrown into question. Family members may also be consumed with guilt, thinking that they somehow should have seen the signs that led to the individual’s suicide.
In this suicide poem, I try to recreate the last hours of a suicidal girl. May we be sensitive enough to read the signs before they escalate.
“don’t come looking for me…”
i know it’s impossible to grasp air
but, have you tried pretence?
you’d step out of nightmares
& mask terror behind faux smiles
you’d sit, with them, around the table
& take a bite of sweetness, like they do.
soon their plates are empty
they’d yearn for more cereals
but, you’d struggle with the first bite.
it tastes like death, this honeycomb
“thanks, mum, for the meal”
you just have to tell this one last lie
you’d walk into the street
& wonder why the sun’s bright
in spite of the haunting darkness
that’s clawing at your sanity
you’d chuckle at how you still breath
having died yesterday
perhaps, this is the afterlife,
but with same people of the other life
you’d shrug. sigh. smile
& pretend to be unalive
but, not today
this. just. have. to. end.
so, stroll into the woods
unknot your tie & make a gallow of same
you take two steps backward
in admiration of your calvary
you pick your pen
& flip through your diary
you make to write a poem
that begins with a quoted line
“don’t come looking for me…”
i wasn’t here from the beginning.
you climb the tree
& stuck your neck in your gallow
you let go of your grip to the branch
& dangle freely like a broken branch
we came looking for you
but found a diary
full of dark poetry
& a tree of rotten apple
Mujidat Olaide
Wow! Deep and dark.
Tibzy
Beautifully inked. May her soul rest in perfect peace.
Jaachi Anyatonwu
Amen. I appreciate your feedback.
Amaobi Uche
I enjoyed reading every word.
Jaachi Anyatonwu
I’m glad you did.
May we find joy
Judith
May we find joy.
Jaachi Anyatonwu
Amen. A lasting one.
Priscilla
This is depressing.
May we find joy
Vicky Mbachu.
we came looking for you
but found a diary
full of dark poetry
& a tree of rotten apple
Sighs.
I can’t find words to describe how sad I am now.
And then, that part you talked about how Family members blame themselves for the death…
Jaachi Anyatonwu
We shall find joy!
Jaachi Anyatonwu
Depression is depressing. May we find joy
Loveth Opeyemi
First I commend this piece of art, the way the words are woven gently to form a basket of thoughts in my mind.
I always cannot wap my head around the thoughts of suicide. May she rest in peace.
Loveth Opeyemi
Firstly, I appreciate this piece of art and how every word was woven to form a basket of thoughts in my mind.
I cannot wrap my head around the reasons why a person would take their own life. My prayer is that light and joy abound in every soul.
May her soul rest in peace
Jaachi Anyatonwu
Amen!
Thanks for the nice words. May we find reasons to LIVE
Aniebiet Effiong
Hmm… I love this cover art. The ending is touchy.
Jaachi Anyatonwu
Thanks, Aniebiet. I love it much more!
Carlos Nah
Great
Jaachi Anyatonwu
Thanks Carlos, for reading.
Ebuscobar Amc Agbolises
Nice one
Jaachi Anyatonwu
Thanks for stopping by.
Nkasiobi Mbonu
I have known this feeling.
Jaachi Anyatonwu
It’s refreshing to know someone else feels just how I feel. Thanks, Nkasiobi