It has been said that life is the most patient teacher. I have been presented with the same experience over and over until I learned the best way to deal with the situation. This is not because life is cruel. Rather, it is because things have a way of coming back to haunt me when I don’t deal with them. One form of intelligence is the ability to learn from mistakes. These mistakes mustn’t necessarily be mine. I also can learn to learn from the mistake of others. Whenever I am presented with a painful experience, I take the time to think about how I can avoid it in the future. This poem outlines how I’m learning to be the me that makes me me.
I’ve learned a lot in the past
and I am learning, on the go,
when God leads to follow,
though the path is rough and narrow.
I’m learning what God feeds to swallow
though the wine taste bitter and the bread sour
I’m learning to let go and let God
and how to, in Him, find joy.
I’m learning that I cannot make others love me the way I’d love them to,
nor make others love me just how I desire to be loved too.
I’m learning to appreciate the people that admire me from a distance,
I’m learning to know it’s not because of ego,
ugly experiences or low self-esteem; they love genuinely,
but just don’t know how to show it.
I’m learning that no matter how much I care,
some people just don’t care back.
For this reason, I love all regardless in the little way I can.
I’m learning to know that I not the saviour mankind
And there shall give no one the pleasure to transfer guilt
Whenever I fail to be there all the time they call.
I’m learning to learn to make out time for loved ones
to pause the world, if need be, to snatch them away
from harm, hurt, hazards.
I’m learning that forgiving takes practice, and that consciously.
I’m learning that forgetting takes forever.
I’m learning to always leave loved ones with loving words.
It may be the last time I see them.
I’m learning to make music to paint my thoughts like an artist,
to create imageries like a poet and to be ultimately at peace with myself.
I’m learning to fill my black holes with droplets of hope,
perhaps someday a life unfair would be bleached to crystal clear,
and that which clouds my mind, I’d fully understand.
I’m learning to chalk dark days with rainbow shades of grey,
perhaps someday, perfection would dawn on me
like sunshine does every even.
I’m learning to speak for myself,
And understand that I am a work in progress.
I’m learning to keep my space sacred and safe
from every form of mental, emotional or physical desecration
I’m learning to find joy in the little things of life
I’m learning to be the me that makes me me.